Out
of the Shadows 25
Dagobah
Mara
found it became all too easy for her to entangle herself in the nothingness of
the routine Skywalker called his life. He had offered to help her with a few
Force-related things while she was on Dagobah if she wanted to stay for a
couple more weeks and she was never one to turn down an offer like that. It
wasn’t as if she was undertaking full Jedi training. Increasing her general
skills would be useful and she wasn’t betraying anyone by doing that.
“No
pressure,” he’d said, his blue eyes apparently guileless. “It’s up to
you. Stay as long as you want to.”
“Sure,
I can spare a couple more days,” she’d answered casually. “But Karrde
will be expecting me to return at some point in the near future. I do work for
him.”
He’d
looked as if he was about to say something but hesitated, thinking better of
it, and nodded. “A few more days,” he echoed. “It’s a start.”
Surprisingly,
Skywalker was a good teacher and she had to admit that she was learning so
much, things that no-one had taught her before – lightsaber techniques,
philosophy, Jedi history, telekinesis, basic healing practices and ways of
maintaining and increasing her fitness. She’d already thought she was in
peak condition but not according to Skywalker’s Jedi standards and after
he’d accompanied her on several runs through the jungle vegetation she had
to agree with him. All the information was delivered from his warped Jedi
perspective but still, all knowledge was useful. The few days more that
she’d planned weren’t nearly enough. A week passed and then another. This
wasn’t just one or two things. Skywalker was indeed training her to become a
Jedi and Mara wasn’t entirely certain how she felt about that. She knew that
she was changing; she was fitter, more grounded within herself and beginning
to accept that perhaps Palpatine hadn’t always been right – that he had,
on more than one occasion, lied to her.
Okay,
she admitted finally. The subject had been gnawing away inside her brain for a
lot longer than even she suspected. How could the master she’d worshipped
more than her own life, who had raised her and taught her everything she knew,
get something so wrong?
And
if he had gotten this wrong, what other falsehoods and mistakes had he
perpetrated? All leaders had to do things they found unpleasant but still…
Nevertheless she stubbornly held onto the belief that Luke had killed her
master even when the evidence was beginning to stack up to the contrary. He
was ultimately responsible.
However,
Skywalker was turning out to be the most honourable and decent man she’d
ever met, if a trifle rigid in his way of thinking, and so annoyingly naïve
that he could have been from a tenth rate farm on a fourth rate planet.
‘Wait! Of course,’ she groused irritably to herself – ‘he was.’
She’d never met anyone who still believed that there was so much good in
people and that even the worst of them could be redeemed if you had enough
faith. She knew that for a fallacy. He was turning her into someone she was
not and she didn’t like it. She’d only agreed to improve her skills –
learn one or two new tricks. Mara Jade was quite happy the way that she was
– at least, that was what she told herself. She had to leave before this
Jedi corrupted her permanently.
But
for the first time in her life, something felt right. She didn’t know how to
explain it but the certainty of the feeling was there. If Skywalker ever lied
to Mara, she would know it. She believed that she knew the young man who
patiently tutored her while ignoring the epithets she hurled at his sandy head
on a daily basis. A sliver of dark amusement twisted across her lips. She
would never have dared to curse the Emperor. Afraid was the wrong word to use,
she thought, but there was a measure of fear in her devotion. If she had
disobeyed Palpatine’s orders, she would not have lived to tell any tales.
She’d
been here long enough, she argued silently. She had to leave Dagobah for the
simple reason that she couldn’t stay forever or she would turn out to be as
misguided and sentimental as the rest of the idealists and traitors who had
formed the rebellion. She suppressed a groan and swiped wildly with her
lightsaber at the sudden blast from the training remote. Even she saw
that as a half-baked excuse. The rebels had won the war and none of her wishes
would change that fact. She had people who depended on her to do the job she
was paid to do. She liked working for Karrde and she had to get back to him.
He trusted her to do that. But still, something kept her with the blue-eyed
young Jedi on Dagobah. She reasoned that his lessons were important because
there was nothing else to stay on Dagobah for. The social scene was pathetic.
She rubbed the stinging area of her anatomy where the remote had scored a
direct hit. “Ow!”
The
remote hovering above her made a darting move to her right and she swirled
around to face it. “Oh no, you don’t,” she muttered and brought up the
humming blue blade in front of her. The whole situation was just too damned
irritating. With a grunt and a final thrust she speared the annoyance that had
been taunting her for weeks. There was a bang and a flash and the remote
crashed to the ground, finally dying in a sputter of angry sparks.
“Hey!”
“What?”
Mara turned around at the sound of booted feet running towards her and glared
at Luke, the blue lightsaber blade still buzzing in front of her.
“What
did you do that for?” Luke stared in dismay at the fragments of his faithful
training remote lying inertly on the ground. He’d had it long before the
Battle of Hoth - in fact, before Yavin - and now it had been rendered useless.
It had been Han’s practice remote from the Falcon which Obi-Wan had
borrowed for Luke’s lightsaber training. He’d never returned it and
Han had never asked. “You were supposed to parry the shots, not kill
the thing. It‘ll never work again, by the looks of it.”
Mara’s
lips curved into a satisfied smile that sent a jolt into the region of
Luke’s heart. “I’ve spent enough time playing around with this
remote.” She closed down her weapon but kept the reassuring feel of the hilt
in her hand. It no longer felt alien to her anymore – it belonged to her.
“Oh!
Maybe you have but…” Luke picked up a small fragment, shaking his head
slowly.
“Why
are you so upset?” she asked curiously. “It was only a training remote.”
“It
was my only remote and I’ve had it for a long time,” he muttered.
“You get…attached to things.”
“It’s
a remote. How can you get attached to that?” She couldn’t believe
what she was hearing. This man had brought down the first Death Star, had
defeated many in battle, was reputed to be one of the greatest pilots in the
galaxy and was supposed to be cruel and uncaring. Yet he missed his sister and
his friends desperately, spoke to his droid as if he was a treasured friend
and was attached to his training remote. Luke Skywalker still didn’t add up
in Mara’s opinion.
“How
do you think I practise?” Luke said, a little lamely.
“With
that remote?” Her mouth flattened at the corners.
“Yes.
With that remote. I’ve had it since I began my training…originally
belonged to Han.” He nudged another piece with the toe of one black-booted
foot. “So you think you are finally ready to fight others…ready to
kill?” He lifted his head to look at her, his gaze searching.
Mara’s
smile disappeared. “Killing is the easy part,” she whispered. “I’ve
done it before – many times.”
“No,
I disagree. It’s not easy at all – I have never found it to be so and I
don’t believe you can find it so either. Maybe the killing part seems easy
when it’s just a faceless, nameless enemy,” he conceded reluctantly.
“You raise your blaster and pull the trigger and wham…someone doesn’t
breathe any more. But the telling yourself that it doesn’t mean anything and
that particular life deserved to be snuffed out, is the really hard part
because you lose part of yourself to the inhumanity of killing. You have
destroyed a life – someone with a history, a family but now – no future.
It’s not a game.”
“I
never thought it was a game, Skywalker.” Mara held his gaze. “It is what I
was trained to be.”
“No,
you can be more,” he said earnestly. “I don’t want that inhumanity to
happen to you, Mara Jade. You’ve lost so much already.”
“No…
I haven’t lost anything,” she denied automatically. “What I did, I did
in service to my master. These people were traitors and deserved what happened
to them.”
“Did
they really?” Luke’s eyes were sad but wise and kind. “Every single one
of them?” Mara looked away unable to answer him. “I know you better than
that, Mara Jade. You didn’t always follow orders did you? Don’t fool
yourself that I believe you didn’t care what you were doing,” he said. “
“I’m
not.” She lifted her chin and stared directly into his eyes. She could lose
herself in their blue depths – they seemed so old for someone so young.
“Sometimes I didn’t obey him as I should. There were occasions when I did
find it hard to do what he asked of me. I even let some of them go.” She
sighed. “I couldn’t…”
“Was
that when he punished you?”
“’Punished!’
How did you…?” Mara’s head dropped, almost appearing too heavy on
her slim shoulders, revealing the vulnerability of her slender neck.
“I
know you,” Luke said. “You are not evil.” Indeed she was not.
Whatever Mara Jade had done in the Emperor’s name had left her untouched by
the dark side, though the anger she nursed internally drew her dangerously
towards it.
“I
deserved my punishments. He didn’t always find out what I had done.”
“Because
you hid it deep within yourself,” Luke guessed softly. “Those lives
didn’t matter to him; otherwise, he would have searched your mind and he
would have discovered your lies. You knew some of it was wrong and those were
the people you spared but you felt guilty, didn’t you.” It wasn’t a
question.
Mara
lifted her head, her eyes bright and defiant. “I hated betraying him
but I couldn’t let those people suffer when there was no need. As for any
others, I enjoyed it.”
“Did
you really? I don’t believe you. It was a task you performed as
emotionlessly as you could. It was the only way you could have survived.”
Luke felt the duality of her anger and her remorse and sent a calming Force
wave towards her. “You have to move on; the past is holding you back.”
“I’m
gaining quite a lot,” she admitted, suddenly changing the subject and
accepting the feelings he had sent to her. “I didn’t expect to. I didn’t
think that there was anything you could teach me.”
Luke’s
mouth quirked into a genuine smile that Mara found affected her breathing. He
looked…pleasant when he smiled. “The only way we should stop learning is
at the same time we stop breathing. I’ll take that as a compliment.” The
subject of Mara’s past was dropped for the moment.
Mara’s
eyebrow arched. “Isn’t that a little presumptive, Skywalker?”
“I’ll
take anything I can get.”
“Wise
of you but when I kill you, remember that you will have actually contributed
to your own demise.”
“I
understand,” he said gravely. “You will make it as quick and painless as
possible?” He didn’t believe that she would kill him – he never had.
“Didn’t
you say that it would be good to have a live opponent?”
“I
believe that I did.” He walked around her, his hand going to the lightsaber
attached to his belt. “But only as long as we both stay alive. An opponent
is no longer an opponent if he is dead.”
“Spoilsport.”
She winked at him, her green eyes sparkling with mischief, her lips curving
into a genuine smile.
Luke’s
breath caught in his throat. She looked so beautiful and so vibrantly alive at
that moment, her bright hair caught loosely in a braid, her slim figure
attired in a body hugging suit. She was perfect.
“What
is it?” Her smile slipped a little. Mara didn’t realise it but she was
becoming as attuned to Luke’s emotions as he was to hers and had felt his
reaction even if she didn’t understand what had caused it.
“Nothing,”
he said simply. At that moment he was happy.
She
frowned at him and all he wanted was to see the smile return. “Honestly,”
he said and was rewarded once more with a smile. Luke detached his lightsaber
from his waist and held it before him. With a nod of his head, he indicated
readiness for their bout and ignited his green blade. For a moment they stood
carefully testing each other until, with a fierce battle cry, Mara attacked.
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Luke
waited, his saber humming lightly in his hands, the Force running through him.
“Do you yield?” he asked calmly, barely breathing any harder than when
they had first begun their sparring match.
“Yes,”
she said, her shoulders heaving with effort. He hadn’t set out to humiliate
her in any way but she knew he’d just taken her defence and tactics apart
with ease. She was practically on her knees with the effort and he was
standing above her looking as if he’d just taken a gentle stroll through the
ornamental gardens at the Skydome Botanical. Her competitive nature stirred,
she had to learn these techniques.
“Well
done,” he praised as he closed down his weapon and affixed it to its
customary place on his belt.
Mara
glanced about her. “Where’s my saber?”
Luke
held out his hand and the weapon flew into it. “Here,” he said, holding
out his other hand to help her to her feet, watching with concern as she
straightened her cramped limbs. “You’re not hurt?”
“I’m
fine.”
“Your
saber is an extension of you. If you are parted from it in a battle or through
accident,” Luke’s mind flashed to the wampa’s cave on Hoth, “you can
call it to your hand. Just reach out with your feelings and focus on holding
the saber in your hand. It’s almost the same as levitation exercises.”
“Lifting
rocks.” Mara grimaced as she rolled her shoulders. “I can’t believe how
much I ache.”
“You
fought well.”
“Not
well enough. I couldn’t beat you,” she said with a rueful smile.
“I’ve
been working almost solely with my lightsaber for quite a few years now – it
has become part of me and an extension of my will. You have become adept in a
very short space of time and are improving rapidly. Very soon you will feel
the strength of your own connection. You don’t have to ‘beat’ me as you
put it. This is not a competition unless it is in your own mind.”
“Let’s
say I thrive on a challenge,” Mara retorted. “Don’t go all Jedi and
other-worldly on me, Skywalker.”
“I
am a Jedi and I always will be. I’m not your enemy and would not like to
fight against you in anger.”
“I
think I know that little homily. You’ve said it often enough to become
boring. Anger and hate all lead to the dark side of the Force.” She brushed
a clinging piece of stray vegetation from her well-toned and shapely derriere.
Unnoticed,
Luke’s hands curled as his eyes unwillingly followed the movement and,
suddenly catching what he was doing, he rushed into speech. “Make no
mistake, Mara. I can be beaten and have been beaten. I did not win against
Vader, nor against the Emperor. Both of them could have killed me if they
chose and Palpatine fully intended to do that. He did not need a lightsaber to
do so.” He shivered as he recalled the sheets of blue lightning erupting
from Palpatine’s fingers. “I am not infallible and would be very foolish
of me to think that.” He rotated his right wrist slowly, remembering. “One
lapse in concentration, a break in my guard and the balance of a battle shifts
as easily as a Vor’s wing on the wind.” He shrugged. “One with the Force
I am.”
“Now
you sound like Yoda,” Mara said. She didn’t want to think about Luke not
being in her life any longer. It already seemed as if he’d always been
there. No, she could threaten and bluster about killing him but she wouldn’t
do it – not when she needed him to train her in the ways of the Force.
“Was there…?”
She
didn’t need to finish her question. Luke knew that she desired to improve
and was asking for his opinion – his help. It was another step forward. He
stepped closer to her and placed his hand on her arm drawing it back and
pushing it through in a swift sweeping motion. “The angle wasn’t quite
correct,” he instructed quietly. “Feel the direction of the stroke and
follow it through.”
Mara
closed her eyes and tried to do what he suggested. “Yes…I can feel the
difference.”
She
tried it again, Luke’s hand still on her arm, correcting and directing the
way she moved. She could feel the difference but her mind wasn’t
concentrating fully on what she should have been. He was very close. She could
feel the soft puff of his breath against her cheek, the heat of his almost
touching body. But she already knew how that felt against her own and gave a
soft shudder of unwilling desire. She had to get away from this situation
before she did something she would regret. She had changed her mind about
killing him but this new closeness was another thing altogether. This was
definitely a step she was not ready to take. Pivoting on her heel she turned
to face him and was immediately caught in the snare of his mesmerising blue
gaze.
“Uh…”
she managed to articulate feebly. This was not a good idea. ‘Think,’ she
frantically castigated herself as her usually reliable brain refused to
function. The distance between them was far too close – too intimate, the
touch of his hand lingering on her elbow burned all the way through her
clothes to her skin. Mara’s hand rose automatically, balancing herself,
resting on his shoulder.
“Mara?”
Their
eyes locked and held. “Luke…” She uttered his given name for the very
first time. Time caught and held as the layers in the Force shifted and
buckled, changing forever, pushing them towards a destiny from which they
could not escape. Her lips were suddenly dry. Tentatively her tongue escaped
from her lips, moistening them. Luke’s eyes darkened as he tracked the
betraying movement. They were young, attractive and nature recognised their
signals even as they would have denied them. Their heads moved together, their
fingers tightened on one another and…
Luke
could see it. He could see them wrapped together in the age old ritual of
desire, skin against skin. But the future was always in motion. What
wouldn’t he give for this to be one of them?
Mara
held her own vision in her mind’s eye. The rumpled bedclothes, their naked
bodies pressed together and Luke’s fevered gaze as he rose above her ready
to…
A
bird shrieked in the trees above their heads and they jerked guiltily apart,
faces flushed with the knowledge of what might have happened.
“I
must…”
“I
need to…” They spoke at the same time.
Luke
took a deep breath trying to separate reality from the vision in his mind.
“Force, that should…”
“Never
have…”
“Happened?”
Luke finished, wryly noting the mixture of horror and naked desire on Mara’s
face. “As I recall, nothing did.”
“But
we…it might have. We nearly…” She closed her mouth tightly over the
words. The brief sexually charged image had been in her imagination.
“You’re right. Nothing happened.”
Luke
swallowed and began to back away, wondering what madness had possessed them to
even think about kissing the other because that was what had almost happened.
The disturbing thing was that the searing image had burned itself into his
brain forever. It wasn’t the right time – if it ever would be judging from
the expression on Mara’s face.
He
was shy with women. The fame he’d won in battle had made many females of
different species interested in him but Luke hadn’t felt comfortable in
handling the fame as many of his comrades had. Those women had wanted the
hero, not the man. Inside he wasn’t just Luke Skywalker, Jedi; he was still
Luke, the farmboy from the planet Tatooine who wanted someone to love him –
the real him.
Mara
seemed to accept him for what he was most of the time and made no effort to
conceal what she really thought about him. Perhaps that was one of her more
appealing aspects but she had been brought up in the Imperial palace and was
used to more sophisticated men and he suddenly felt a bit ‘ordinary’ in
her presence.
‘Stang!’
he thought. He’d actually considered kissing her. “I’m just going to
check on my X-wing,” he gabbled nervously. “There are things growing in
one of the engine filters. It’s not healthy.” He rubbed his hand across
his forehead. Had he really said what he thought he had? He’d flown in
battle countless times, met beings from many worlds, faced Vader and the
Emperor together and yet, he could find himself completely tongue-tied in
front of this particular woman. He admitted to himself that she affected him
in ways that no one else had.
“Your
ship?”
“Yes,
I need to send a message to…to Leia.”
“You
can do that from here?” Mara hoped in vain that her voice sounded normal
because she didn’t feel that way and would die of embarrassment if the Jedi
noticed. “I could have contacted Karrde?”
“No,
not from here.”
“A
message to Leia, huh! A bit sudden after three years.” Mara’s voice was
caustic though she was glad to have something to take her mind off the images
still disturbing her.
So,
thought Luke, she had heard him recording a message to his sister and wondered
if he had mentioned her arrival. “Leia knows I’m still alive. She would
feel it through the Force if I was not no matter how far apart we are.” His
words were stilted. “I recorded the message not long after you arrived here.
I just haven’t had a chance to send it.”
Mara
began to recover her equilibrium as Luke appeared to lose his. He was
embarrassed, she thought. And she remembered her idea of keeping him
off-balance. It was time to even the score. He may win at lightsaber
techniques but she could still best him and planned to continue doing so any
way she could. Using her femininity was one way. The only problem was that
this method had turned on her in an astonishing fashion and she wasn’t sure
if she liked the effect. Or perhaps she liked the effect far too much.
Killing
him had conveniently gone from her mind.
“I
have to send a message from above Dagobah’s atmosphere,” he said
hurriedly. “The planet’s atmosphere doesn’t allow it, for one thing, and
we are too far out on the rim for another. I must go nearer to one of the main
planets and find a suitable signal to relay my own from.” He continued to
stare at her and then dropped his eyes, flushing, to examine his scuffed
footwear. “I’ll be back in a couple of hours…”
“Hours!”
she echoed, taking a step closer to him.
Their
eyes met and Luke stretched out a hand towards her cheek. “You know that you
are very lovely, Mara Jade.” There was a pregnant pause as Luke realised
what he had said.
“But
I’ve done such things,” she whispered.
His
hand fell to his side and he took a step away from her. She was still
unpredictable in many ways and so was he. He couldn’t even control what came
out of his own mouth. Many women wanted to be viewed as much more than their
outward appearances and Mara was definitely one of those. Luke could
understand that but she was hurting and confused and he had to help her become
whole. “I’m sorry,” he apologised. “I shouldn’t have said that but
it’s true. Inside as well as on the outside. You’ll have to learn to
believe it eventually. I have never seen anyone so beautiful.”
“What!”
Mara’s mind whirled as she watched Luke Skywalker, hero of the rebellion,
sprint away towards his ship. “Wait!” Moments later it rose into the air.
“He never checked it for…” Hands on her hips, Mara watched as the X-wing
disappeared from sight. “Well, I suppose he is coming back. All his stuff is
still here.” Her lips curved. “He said I was lovely. Oh!” What was she
supposed to make of that? Many men had said that she was beautiful but none
had done it quite like the young Jedi. So the Jedi was not a monk after all.
He had noticed that she was a woman.
From
behind her came a frantic and faintly plaintive electronic warble. “He’s
gone flying, droid,” she snapped, reassured by Luke’s haste and Artoo’s
continuing presence on the planet’s surface. Skywalker would not leave
Dagobah without his droid.
Artoo
rotated his little domed head and whistled another question.
“I
don’t know when he’ll be back but he’s certainly stupid enough to return
for a droid that talks so much,” she gritted irritably. “Now, quit your
pathetic whining and go and make yourself useful. I’m going for a run. I
need to start thinking about getting off this rock, too. I’ve been here for
far too long.”
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Coruscant
Han
Solo checked his wrist chrono and wrinkled his forehead. It was late and he
was about to put his foot down but, hopefully, not so firmly that it would
make Leia object. “Your messages are piling up,
Highnessness,” he commented quietly.
“I
know and these are the ones my staff have allowed me to deal with myself.
They’ve intercepted the non-essential communications.” She sighed and
rubbed a hand wearily across her forehead. “Ignore them; I’ll deal with
them tomorrow. I’ve done enough for tonight.”
“You
should be taking things a little easier, sweetheart.”
“All
of the Inner Council is working at the same pace until we get the next world
into the Republic. The surplus it grows could feed several worlds where the
agriculture has been ruined by war. I know Mon Mothma is exhausted because
I’m tired and she bears the heaviest load of us all.”
“I
know but you can’t go on like this. None of you can. Mon Mothma included.”
“It
should get easier after this next treaty is completed. The number of
candidates accepted into diplomatic training courses has been drastically
increased.” She eased away from the desk and stiffly stood up, feeling her
bones protesting from sitting too long in one position. Han was instantly
behind her, his hands massaging her shoulders.
“Better?”
“Much.”
She relaxed gratefully into his touch. “I can’t believe he kept it.”
“Kept
what…oh!” His hands stilled for a moment and then resumed their gentle
massage.
“Luke’s
hand.” Leia’s words emerged in a whisper.
“Yeah,
at first I couldn’t believe it either. It sounds like the kind of sick thing
‘old yellow eyes’ would do.”
“I’m
glad I didn’t have to deal with it.”
“You
shouldn’t have to. Winter didn’t want any of us to do so and she was
right.” He stepped away from her and retrieved her cloak, placing it about
her. “Come on. If you’re sure you’re finished?” Leia nodded. “Then
let’s go home.” Han began to steer her towards the door.
The
com centre interrupted them with a defiant beep indicating the arrival of
another message. “Ignore it,” Han said. “It will keep until tomorrow.”
“Yes,
it will.” Then Leia stopped, a strange expression crossing her face. “Han,
I want to read that message.”
“Save
it for tomorrow, sweetheart. It will keep.”
“No,”
she said. “It feels important.”
“Feels
important?” Han’s mouth dropped open. “Uh-oh!”
Leia
closed her eyes, took a deep breath and then opened them again. Her face was
determined…resolute. “Yes, Han. I can feel it.” She moved back to her
desk and tried to pull up the message with Han next to her, peering at the
screen. “This is only an announcement alert - the message is being held up
by some relay station a long way off and is waiting for verification of a
stronger signal at this end. The signal from that end is very faint, almost
indistinct.”
“It’s
based on some very old technology - almost like someone hotwired a short range
transmitter to get more power - and it’s come a long way,” Han murmured,
hope lifting his voice. “I’ll see if I can borrow one of Cracken’s
listening posts for a few moments and get a good lock on the signal which may
help us get a better reception.” He began fiddling with the controls. “I
think we have it…yes. Got it.” He gave a sigh of relief. “It’s coming
through now.”
“It’s
a holo-recording.” Leia glanced at Han and saw her own feelings mirrored in
his gaze. There was hope and a little fear.
“Luke?”
“Could
be.” Leia’s hand shook as she flicked the switch, her breathing ragged.
The hologram was faint, the image being of low resolution and in black and
white, but it was unmistakeably her brother. Leia drank in the sight of him,
her eyes suspiciously bright. Han, too, placed his hand across his eyes and
bowed his head in some sort of prayer.
“Hello,
Leia...Han.” Luke stood waiting, his hands joined together in front of him,
dressed in what appeared to be the same black tunic and cloak that he’d left
in. Han stifled some sort of oath and paused the image.
Leia
pressed her trembling fingers to her lips and allowed Han to sweep her into
his arms. “Force, I’ve missed him so much.”
“I
know. It’s good to finally know that he’s alive.” Han’s voice was
cracked and rough, as if he hadn’t used it in a long time. Seeing the Kid
brought it right home to him how incomplete their little family was without
its true heart.
“I
always knew that he was alive, Han. I just needed to know that he was safe and
well and would come back to us and now I do.”
“Let’s
listen to what he has to say first before we totally get our hopes up. I’ll
see if I can wash the signal to get rid of some of the static.”
“He’s
coming home, Han, and that’s all that matters,” Leia stated fervently.
“Maybe not tomorrow or next week but I’m convinced we shall see him
soon.”
She
reached out and restarted the image.
“Hello,
Leia and Han,” he said simply. “I’m coming home.” There was a minute
pause as if Luke was working out what exactly to say to them after all this
time.
“Master
Yoda became one with the Force very recently.” Sorrow briefly showed in his
expressive face. “Before he died, he conferred on me the rank of a fully
trained Jedi Knight and teacher. I could not leave him before then for more
than a couple of days at a time. He was very weak towards the end and could
not have been moved. If I’m truthful, I would say that he didn’t want to
be moved and intended to breathe his last on this strange world which
sheltered him from the darkness of Palpatine’s regime. I’m preparing to
leave this hiding place for good. I have learned all that I can here. I need
to return to restart the Jedi Order. It is the task I have been given and one
I will spend the rest of my life doing.”
Leia
noted that he hadn’t mentioned the word ‘trying’. Jedi did.
“It
won’t be easy,” he said gravely. “I will need your full support and that
of the
Luke
turned his head as if he was watching for someone. “It’s been hard to be
apart from you without contact but it is coming to an end now. I knew this as
soon as you sent Mistress Jade. The Force allowed her to find me.”
“Sent
Mistress Jade?” Han echoed, pausing the message. “Oh, so Mara got to
Dagobah safely, did she?”
“She
must have,” murmured Leia. “And however long ago this message was recorded
and sent…it has come a long way, she must still be there.”
“The
Force allowed…” Han shook his head and snorted. “That was careful
research.”
“We’ve
had access to the same areas of research and found nothing.”
“We
didn’t know where to look for them. Mara did.”
“Maybe,
but it could still be the Force.”
“Mistress
Jade? He’s very formal,” Han said, with a glint in his eye. “The Mara we
know and er…love can be somewhat abrasive.”
“Luke’s
probably met that side of her; hence the formality.”
“Yes,
she wasn’t one of his greatest fans before she left as I recall. But he’s
still alive, so she hasn’t made good her threat to kill him.”
“She
promised not to kill him,” Leia replied quickly. “And I believe her.”
“So
do I now, oddly enough,” Han quipped with a smirk and restarted the message.
“Could
you please inform Talon Karrde of her safety,” Luke said carefully, taking
another cautious glance behind him. “I’m sure he would wish to know.”
“Karrde’s
away somewhere remote,” Leia said. “But…”
Han
sighed as he paused the message again. “He left details of how to contact
him if necessary. He has several bases dotted about the galaxy. ” Han noted
that the flickering Luke on the screen was glancing over his shoulder. “Does
the Kid look nervous to you?”
“I
don’t know but he keeps looking behind him.” She studied the image. “I
don’t get the sense that he’s concerned about anything.”
“Maybe
if Jade is there, he’s worried that she’ll sneak up behind him.”
“You
can’t sneak up on Luke – he’s a Jedi.”
“Sure
you can. Or maybe he’s just looking at her – she is rather striking.
He’s been alone there for over three years with only Yoda for company.
Having a gorgeous woman to stare at…”
“Luke’s
not like that,” Leia protested.
“He
likes women, sweetheart. He never was one for the boys and, believe me, some
of them asked.”
“Han!”
Leia’s eyes widened.
“Just
telling it like it is. He’s human. Not a monk.”
“I
never said he was,” Leia murmured defensively. “I’d like to see him
happy with a suitable woman and a family.”
“Ah,
you don’t think the spectacular Mistress Jade is suitable.” Han grinned
wickedly. “They could just have an affair then. He’s had the occasional
quiet one before.”
Leia
looked pained. “Han Solo! My brother is a Jedi Knight and much as I like
Mara, she wanted to kill him.”
“Which
you don’t believe she’ll do.”
“No.
But it’s hardly the basis for a lasting relationship, is it?”
Han
looked his fiancée shrewdly. “You wouldn’t be jealous, would you?”
“What!”
“Jealous
that Jade has been with him and spent time with him before you have? Jealous
that she was able to go to Dagobah to bring him home?”
“No!
Of course not.”
But
Han thought that her words lacked conviction. Whatever Leia’s view of Luke
was, he hadn’t spent all of his time in the rebellion flying his X-wing. If
she persisted in seeing him as a mystical monk-like figure who would calmly
accept everything the
Luke
faced the holo-imager again and smiled. He looked exactly the same - perhaps
thinner - but there was an air of calm about him that Leia hadn’t seen
before. “If you could arrange for quarters to be opened on Coruscant for me,
I will need somewhere to stay when I arrive. Oh, and please, don’t announce
it to the holo-press or the Senate committee quite yet. I’d rather keep my
return quiet for a little while longer. I’ll contact you again soon. May the
Force be with you.” He raised a hand in farewell and then he was gone.
Leia
transferred the holo to a portable carrier she had and Han suspected it would
be played numerous times over the next few days.
“I
told you he’d be fine, sweetheart,” Han said, grinning widely.
“Pardon
me if I’m mistaken, flyboy, but you were the one who wanted to go looking
for him convinced he was in some sort of trouble and even hired Karrde to find
him for you.”
“I
was only doing it for you.”
“Of
course.” Leia rolled her eyes.
“I
was because that’s the sensitive kind of guy I am.”
“And
that’s why I love you, nerfherder.” Leia reached up and ruffled his hair.
“Hey!”
Han jerked his head away and valiantly tried to smooth it back into place.
“Come
on.” Leia stood up and opened the door, waiting patiently for Han to pass
through before activating the security control. “He
looked well, didn’t he?”
“Yes.
A bit thinner, but well.”
“He
seemed happier too.”
“Maybe
Mara Jade’s given him a reason to smile.” He winked.
“Han
Solo!”
“Seriously,
Leia, he got what he wanted. He managed to finish his training. Now he can
come home where he belongs.”
“Yes,
it will be wonderful to have him with us again but I wish it was that easy.”
She sighed. “He will need to find somewhere to teach his Jedi and I don’t
think Coruscant will suit him. Especially as his own training was on Dagobah
and it’s not known for its cities and technology.”
“I
know. But at least we’ll know where he is once he finds somewhere to settle
and be able to visit him on occasions. It’ll be fun, sweetheart. Coruscant
is too close to the Senate and the politicians. There are far too many
distractions and possible interferences. He won’t want that.” Han smirked
at his fiancée. “He left so that he could do his Jedi thing his own way.”
“He
might want to have an office on Coruscant. The Jedi temple was located here
after all.”
“Yes,
but look what happened to it.” Han pressed the call button for the turbo
lift. “After you.”
They
entered the lift and stood in silence until they reached the level which
contained the private vehicle hangar for important members of the inner
council.
“Let’s
get you home,” Han said, helping her into the closed speeder he’d been
using since he’d arrived on Coruscant. It was less noticeable than the Millennium
Falcon and it was giving him the chance to give the Falcon the
overhaul it needed.
“Yes,
let’s go home. I want to sleep for at least two days but that is not going
to happen. Tomorrow I can see if there’s anywhere in the Imperial palace for
him to stay. It has to be close to us.”
Han
screwed up his face and shook his head. “I would wait a bit. I think
you’re moving a little fast with this. Until he walks through the door of
our apartment we won’t know exactly what he is planning to do.”
“I
want to help him and he asked me to find him somewhere to stay.”
“I
know you do and you’ll find him an apartment but wait until he tells you
exactly what he wants you to do.”
“We
know what he wants,” she said.
“We
do?” Han eased into the busy stream of traffic for the short journey to
their apartment.
“We
do,” she stated firmly. “After he comes home and finds somewhere to stay,
he wants to restart the Jedi Order.”
Han’s
lip twitched into a smile. “And to do that, he’s going to need Jedi.”
“Yes.
He is.”
“Lots
of them.” Han swooped into a low, overhanging door and gradually coasted to
a stop. “One of the reasons I love this apartment is...”
“You
can park the speeder easily?” Leia smiled slyly.
“Nope,
but that is a good reason. I can park the speeder easily. More
importantly, I can get the Falcon in the private hangar too and kiss
you without anyone seeing.”
Their
home was cool and quiet and Leia finally relaxed but Han could see she wanted
to view Luke’s holo message again.
“Didn’t
Lando send you information about some guy on Bespin?” Han asked, making for
the bottle of Whyren’s reserve on the sideboard.
“Yes,
he did – a gas prospector on Tibannopolis. He’s in the
Han
groaned. “So he’s schizophrenic.”
“No,
he’s not…well, I suppose he could be.” Leia gave a rueful shrug.
“Lando said that this man. Steen or Streen, I think his name is, can predict
where the tibanna gas can be found on Bespin without instruments or devices
and is always right. He gets the strikes before any of the corporations and
their technical equipment. It proved to be his downfall.”
“Ah,”
Han’s voice was dry. “Someone decided to get rid of the competition.”
“Yes.
He almost died. Lando said that they have to keep him sedated otherwise he
gets no peace. The medical droid on
“Ouch.
Reminds me of carbonite.”
“He’s
lived most of his life alone, finds it difficult to be around other people.
Lando thinks that Luke is the only one who can help him. Without seeing this
man I cannot be sure but Lando’s probably right.”
“You
thought that one of the Mon Calamari ambassadors might have some Jedi
potential, didn’t you?” Han handed Leia a glass of amber coloured spirit.
“Cilghal?”
“I
couldn’t remember her name. Admiral Ackbar was impressed with her political
abilities.”
“She’s
a highly intelligent being – most astute. When we went on a tour of a field
hospital, she actually told me that she almost became a doctor rather than a
diplomat because she could tell when a severely ill being would live or die
and wanted to know how she could help. She couldn’t explain it, she just
knew. I remember my father talking about healers and he said that they were
the rarest of the Jedi.”
Han
chuckled. “Believe me, sweetheart, as I’ve never known anyone with such an
affinity for landing himself in a bacta tank, I would suspect that Luke will
need a healer amongst his Jedi as well as someone who hears voices on the
wind.”
Leia’s
eyes glimmered with the happy sheen of tears. Her brother was coming home.
“He will, won’t he?”
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Dagobah
The
X-wing touched down with a slightly heavier whumph than usual and an exhausted
Luke exited the snub fighter to find a frosty-faced reception committee.
“You
said ‘a couple of hours’, Skywalker,” Mara Jade snapped. “It’s been
more than half a day’s rotation by the droid’s last calculation. He was
beginning to worry about you.”
He
pulled off his gloves and helmet and glanced towards his little droid,
jiggling from side to side with impatience and concern. ”I’m alright,
Artoo.” Artoo responded by subjecting his master to a scolding as only he
could, using the full extent of his electronic range.
“I’m
sorry little fella,” Luke muttered.
“You
apologise to the droid and not to me?” Mara said incredulously.
“He
was concerned about me. You, I’m not so sure of. I thought you wouldn’t
mind if I became one with the Force.” He strode towards his home, in no mood
to bandy words around with her.
Mara
followed him. “Of course I was worried.”
“You
were?” Surprise coloured his voice as he stopped and turned to face her.
Mara
scowled and ducked her head, surprised that she had admitted to missing him
and mad that she had acknowledged it. “You’d been gone a long time. The
droid was getting screechy. It was irritating.”
Luke’s
face lost all expression. “I had to go further than I thought to find a
decent relay station to send my message to Leia. Then the X-wing started to
play up.” He began to move again but Mara blocked his path.
“Your
ship?” For the first time since they had met Mara’s face showed real
concern as she sensed his weariness. “Skywalker…” She could see that his
face was grey with strain and tiredness underneath sooty streaks of grime.
“Can you fix it? I heard that you were good with technical things.”
He
coloured briefly at the compliment and then shook his head. “It won’t fly
again without a serious overhaul and it’s not going to get that here. I can
only fix so much. So it’s never going to fly again.” He looked upset
before blanking his expression once again.
“No,
I guess not.” She walked towards him and put a hand cautiously on his
shoulder. “What happened?”
“Not
sure. The engine seemed to miss several beats, there was some sort of
circuitry failure and finally some smoke.”
“Smoke!”
Mara’s eyes widened. “How did you land the thing?”
“The
Force,” he said quietly. “But it took a lot out of me. It’s not good to
draw on my power like that.” His knees began to buckle. “I need to go and
lie down for a bit. “
Mara
felt Luke’s legs wobble and moved to help support him without thinking. She
could feel his weariness engulf her as the body contact grew and she
unconsciously sent her strength to help him. “Careful, Farmboy,” she
chided. It didn’t seem right to tersely bark out his surname as she usually
did. He wasn’t the all powerful Jedi at this moment, just a tired young man
that she could help. “Lean on me.”
“I’m
fine,” he whispered. “But you’re going to have to give me a lift out of
here since I’m without transport.”
“I’m
sure that can be arranged for a small fee,” she said dryly “Now, you said
you were going to lie down. I suggest you do that before you collapse and end
up in the mud. I wouldn’t recommend it.”
“No.”
Luke drew himself up and with Mara’s help walked to his cot. “I’ll put
myself into a healing trance,” he said. “Watch and let me show you how it
is done.”
Mata
rolled her eyes. “Ever the instructor, Skywalker.” But she did as he
requested. He subsided onto the bed, closed his eyes and then she felt him
vanish – no, not vanish exactly. His presence had muted, switched onto what
a droid might term ‘standby mode’.
For
a moment she watched him sleep, his eyelashes resting gently against his
smooth cheeks. Her lips twisted and she shook her head. Her life would never
be the same again now that she was beginning to know him. She lifted her hands
and smoothed the hair on his forehead. It just felt like the natural thing to
do and then, leaving him to his rest, she walked away towards the X-wing.
Climbing up the ladder she peered into the cockpit and gasped. The whole
instrument panel was twisted and buckled with the heat of the systems
malfunction. There should have been no way that Skywalker should have been
able to land the ship – no way at all. He could have died and how would she
have felt about that? Mara didn’t know but she thought that she might have
been sorry. No, she would have been… devastated.
A
glance into the engine told a similar story. This X-wing was history. “So
I’m going to have a couple of passengers, am I, Artoo?” she asked the
droid.
Artoo
beeped an agreement. She wasn’t so bad, really, once you overlooked her
tendency to threaten.
********************************************